Your Dream Was Your Ticket Out
I think most people in our vast reading audience remember the great television show that aired in the middle of the 1970s titled Welcome Back Kotter starring Gabe Kaplan as the school teacher who grew up in the neighborhood and is now in charge of a very ethnic and racially diverse class called the “Sweathogs.” His dream was his ticket out.
As we have talked about many times Hickenlooper, who would probably go back for seconds at the Last Supper, finds himself in no man’s land and after two years of throwing rocks at what senators do for a living, including disparaging remarks that he is a leader and a doer, (and I don’t know if that’s the scotch or he actually believes he got things done) now wants to be dragged kicking and screaming to be the next senator where we all stand a mile high, Colorado.
But the “Sweathog” theme really does intrigue me. We could have Andrew Romanoff playing Arnold Horshack. Bill Ritter as Juan Epstein. Jena Griswold as Rosalie (Hotsy Totsy) and, last but not least, Michael Hancock as Freddy Boom Boom Washington.
So, putting on my futurist cap, how does this dope out? The nonexistent Democrat senatorial field will fold like a house of cards and John Hickenlooper, the man who never wanted to be a senator will become our next senator. Why you query? Because as we have said many times, many ways, the state of Colorado’s Republican party will guarantee a Hickenlooper win. We have a series of huge political issues that inflame conservative and libertarian minds in Colorado.
• Red flag. I don’t know what the count is on counties and sheriffs, city councils and commissioners who have flatly told Jared Polis don’t bring it here because we won’t enforce it.
• Popular vote. They threw our constitutional rights out the window this year as well.
• Fracking. The known economic destruction of northern Colorado.
• And last but not least, my personal favorite, attorney general Phil, aka Bud Weiser, has become a friend of the court who will attempt to bring back heroin, meth, and cocaine injection sites into the state of Colorado after it was tossed out. These people are like monsters in Steven King novels — they never die.
But look at those issues that I’ve stated. Have you seen Cory Gardner go into the hinterland and rally people to his cause that he will take these issues on? Of course not. What is it that Cory Gardner needs to do? He needs to get his man card back. He needs to go to training camp. He needs a lot of roadwork. He maybe learns how to dirty box. Maybe some UFC MMA takedowns that he can use on Hickenlooper. But you and I both know that he has no intention of doing any of those things. Hickenlooper by his own description is a bad debater. Throwing his arms up like a wild bird at Cory like he did to Bernie Sanders just ain’t going to cut it.
But here’s the real indicator about the weak sticks in the media. My former coworker Dan Caplis made Hickenlooper tap out on his radio show about a month ago. I mean choke, turn blue in the face and squeal like a pig and then get to walk away. Isn’t it fascinating The Denver Post, hard-hitting Channel9 never said a word. Note to Cory Gardner, Dude unless you start to tune up, you’re beat.
Note to John, I’m not cut out to be a senator, Hickenlooper [February 2019]. Along with senators don’t build teams. Senators sit and debate in small groups. I’m a doer and that gives me joy. Hey, John I’ve got your joy for you right here. Get ready folks. It’s gonna be a rough night.
— Peter Boyles