by Mark Smiley | Aug 29, 2014 | Feature Story Bottom Left
So you’re putting yourself out there and you’re dating, congrats. But let me ask you, if the perfect person for you presented themself to you would you even know it? Would you be ready to love and be loved? Would you even know what love is or how to nurture it in a healthy, positive way.
My guess is probably not and I don’t say this to be rude or condescending, I say this because the dating culture has become so self-absorbed with people who chase an idea rather than an actual person, a person who enhances your life rather than pushing you back into the cauldron of toxic, soul crushing relationships.
I look at daters everywhere who scare the daylights out of me. Let’s face it, if you’re reading my column the chances are good that you’re single, and if you’re single there is a good chance it’s for a reason. My experience from interacting with an abundance of unattached people from all walks of life is that they all share one major commonality. They are not single because they “haven’t found the right person,” they are single because they are unmarketable.
Time and time again I see people frantic to attach themselves to someone. I get it. Who wants to be alone and not share intimate moments with someone special? Nobody, unless you’re so beat down by life you just throw in the towel and give up. But for the most part, I do believe people need to feel loved and have a lot of love to give. Newsflash! Your love means squat if you don’t have any substance behind it and/or you don’t know how to display it.
Have you ever heard people say, “everyone I’m interested in being with isn’t into me and everyone who is interested in me, I’m not interested in?” Personally I think that is very telling and it isn’t by chance. It’s because people are always striving for someone better than themselves or someone who they think can fill a void that they’re unable or not willing to fill themselves. But lo and behold, nature takes charge and just like water that finds its own level, humans do too.
Daters everywhere play this sick little song and dance. A song and dance called how can I find someone who fits my idea of what I’m looking for, and then customize a perception about themselves that they project that has nothing to do with who they actually are. Why? Fear I suppose, fear that if the other person catches on to who they really are the other person will run like someone is chasing them with a knife. As well they should if you’re not being genuine.
Being a single guy myself I see this and have lived this exercise in futility first hand. Let’s face it, we could all be in a relationship if we wanted to right this second. What’s the reason we’re not? Answer: because we all want the best, the crème de la crème. But be honest with yourself right now, are you the best you, are you good for someone’s life that is happy, healthy, thriving and ready for honest, untainted love? If your honest answer is no, no you are not ready to provide the same for someone that you want out of them, then please stop. Stop trying to infuse your complicated life into the lives of those who have put in the time to make themselves viable for a loving relationship. Just stop, leave them alone.
Here is a quick check list for you to use to gauge whether you’re ready to love and be loved in a healthy relationship.
- Do you have a tendency to be dishonest and reframe reality so someone will like you? If so, you’re not ready.
- Do you get offended by the truth and easily hurt by it? If so, you’re not ready.
- Do you seek out people to fulfill an idea you have or to fill a void in yourself, i.e., you want a baby; you need money; you want arm candy; you can’t stand to be alone with yourself; your friends are all getting hitched but you’re not; you think being with someone will make you happy when otherwise you are not; and the list goes on… If so, you’re not ready.
- You have jealousy and/or anger issues? If so, you’re not ready.
- You believe the other person should act and react to situations just like you would and if they don’t you get upset? If so, you’re not ready.
- You don’t understand that humans are fallible and will disappoint you on occasion and you take it very personally? If so, you’re not ready.
- You don’t believe in letting people exercise their free will and you don’t have the ability to let them do what drives them and then decide if their actions are right for you? If not, you’re not ready.
- You are unable or unwilling to identify things in your life that could be deemed dangerous and toxic to a good person and work hard on fixing those things? If not, you’re not ready.
- You are so damaged from prior relationships that when someone displays love and kindness to you subconsciously push them away or sabotage it? If so, you’re not ready.
- Lastly, you don’t love yourself? If so, you’re not ready.
Let me leave you this month with a quote from an amazing man who knew more about love than all of us combined, and touched more people’s hearts than any of us could ever hope to. “If she’s amazing, she won’t be easy. If she’s easy, she won’t be amazing. If she’s worth it, you won’t give up. If you give up, you’re not worthy. … Truth is, everybody is going to hurt you; you just gotta find the ones worth suffering for.” ~ Bob Marley
P.S. I am starting an exclusive club in Denver called The Modern Dater Club that will be chock-full of prescreened viable daters who will be individually screened by me, and I will have fun, small, preplanned excursions for you to take part in. If you have interest in finding out more information you can personally email me on the contact page on www.themoderndater.com. Until we meet again! ~ Sheik
by Mark Smiley | Aug 29, 2014 | Editorials
The Denver City Council was once a political body that the news media in Denver, including newspapers and television stations, regularly covered. John Hickenlooper’s rise to the office of mayor changed all of that. His approval ratings stayed well into the 70s for his entire two terms in office and that cowered many City Council members. Hickenlooper privately would mock how supine and powerless certain individual council members were. He would note that all he had to hang on to was five council members as it took nine votes out of 13 to overturn any veto the mayor might come up with.
However, the City Council as a relevant political entity may be returning as a result of the Denver Sheriff Department scandal. While Hickenlooper keeps his contempt of the individual members of the City Council private, a less adept Mayor Hancock has made it publicly obvious. He appointed a Sheriff Department Executive Steering Committee to hire an outside firm to review the Sheriff Department and recruit candidates for the sheriff’s position. He chose six people, all of whom were appointees he controlled, such as City Attorney Scott Martinez and Chief of Staff Janice Sinden.
The City Council has been under a lot of public pressure for simply rubber stamping multi-million dollar settlements with jail inmates and not being more involved in demanding reforms. The City Council reasonably requested a representative on the steering committee. Hancock, incredibly, stiff armed them declaring he would update them at the weekly meeting he and his staff have with the City Council.
When the first such meeting occurred Mayor Hancock didn’t even bother to attend saying he needed to spend more time with his family. He was, in fact, inside the City and County Building when the meeting occurred.
The City Council had finally had enough. The usually meek and compliant Jeanne Robb erupted at David Edinger, who is overseeing the steering committee, and Stephanie O’Malley, Denver’s public safety director: “What are you thinking. I am astonished. You’ve set up council to be included to question every move. The public is upset, and I’m very upset.”
The mayor’s representatives had come to the meeting unprepared with no reports or materials for the council to review emphasizing how little they thought of the City Council. Councilman Charlie Brown was incredulous stating, “Let’s be more professional about how we are treated here.”
Mayor Hancock was informed by his staff that it was actually possible to offend Denver City Council members. Hancock relented and added two members of the City Council, Jeanne Robb and Paul Lopez, to the committee. Hancock, of course, did not want council members to think that they were all that important so he also added four regular citizens to his committee. The 13 person committee is now as large as the Denver City Council itself.
Denver has the so-called “strong mayor” form of government. Notwithstanding the same, City Council has a great deal of power under the City Charter if it elects to exercise it. The City Council is the only branch of government that can adopt or revoke legislation. It also controls all budgetary matters. The mayor’s staff wrote on the City’s website describing how the City Council actually performs its critical role in the budgetary process as follows: “to date, council modifications of the budget have been relatively minor.” It is an unintentional, but damning, critique on how the City Council members as a whole have undertaken their statutory obligations to the public in recent years.
It is about time City Council members start acting like real elected officials with constituents and not simply potted plants. There is more to being a Denver City Council member than simply approving by large margins every ill conceived real estate project that comes along. The Sheriff Department Executive Steering Committee debacle shows that City Council members can make a difference if they choose to do so.
— Editorial Board
by Peter Boyles | Aug 29, 2014 | Blasting with Boyles
Years ago as a young man in the radio business, I had the ultimate pleasure of working for one of the most gifted general managers I ever knew. His name was Joe Ryan (another Irishman in radio — who knew?) He came up with the concept and idea that’s driven me through the rest of my radio career. Ryan called it the “triple bank shot.” And it went like this.
You have the cue and you hit the ball. It hits the first rail. At that point the station makes money. Off of that rail, it hits the opposing rail. At that point the DJ makes money and if the ball is fast enough to make it to the third rail, the sponsor can make a buck.
This is my “triple bank shot” of how bad the Denver media is.
Number one. There’s a Washington organization called CREW, known as Citizens for Responsibility and Ethics in Washington. About a quarter of a million dollars came to Colorado to the Republican Attorneys General Association (RAGA) just before that group, headed up by John Suthers, donated (i.e. washed) the money for a third party that gave Tom Tancredo his last hurrah. Bob Beauprez says he has no idea where the money came from. And John Suthers, erstwhile Attorney General who happens to be one of the driving forces in the RAGA and a huge Beauprez booster, also ‘“Schultzed” it that he had no knowledge of anyone’s involvement in the Colorado gubernatorial primary.
Now, my mother raised a lot of ugly children but not a lot of real dumb ones. Bob Beauprez wants to be your next governor and has no idea how the money got here? John Suthers, on the other hand, has not returned my phone call. And then lo and behold almost like the genie in Aladdin, New Jersey Governor Chris Christie shows up to take a victory lap with both-ways Bob. Oh and BTW, Chris Christie chairs the Republican Governors Association. In the words of Gomer Pyle, “Surprise, surprise.”
Next: The Return of the Native, Michael Huttner. Huttner has recently been lionized in The Denver Post by Joey Bunch. With a headline “Michael Huttner’s return to Colorado politics ups the campaign season ante.” It’s a glowing piece on Huttner. We’re told Huttner has returned to Colorado because he’s tired of Beauprez’s “extreme backward views” and Beauprez’s history of “unethical conduct.” Oh, by the way, he’s arrived with $1.7 million in TV ad contracts, according to the FCC.
But let’s call for a time-out on the field and maybe somebody other than this newspaper will tell the truth about Michael Huttner and his butt boy Jason Salzman. In August 2009, the two published a book titled “50 Ways You Can Help Obama Change America.” At the time this was out of Progress Now. Huttner and Salzman promised a round trip ticket for two to Hawaii and a visit to the birth hospital of Obama. The winner would leave on Martin Luther King’s birthday and go there and volunteer to help the poor in Hawaii. No one ever won that prize. No trip was given away and like a thief in the night Huttner split town.
Now, I can’t be just the only person who remembers that grift, the long con. When you promise an award and then not give it you have violated Colorado and federal law. That’s according to the Colorado Consumer Protection Act (attention Tom Martino). I have not been able to interest John Suthers or, for that matter, Mitch Morrissey, Denver’s fighting DA, to take a look at Huttner and Salzman. Frankly, Michael Huttner talking about unethical behavior is truly laugh out loud funny. I got your way to help Obama change America. In January of 2017 when, like Huttner he will leave.
Note to Huttner and Salzman. Anytime you two clowns want to come on the radio show, it’s 303-696-1971. I’m sure you’ll appear right after Suthers.
The next person in the triple bank shot is Colorado’s modern day Fagan with his band of little thieves. I’m sure you’ve not heard or seen the story of the last of the Romanoffs greeting and meeting a carload of little dreamers who came to chalk up the sidewalk in front of Iron Mike Coffman’s headquarters. The video is classic. You can see it on my website, 710knus.com.
On the 27th of June former Colorado House Speaker Andrew the last of the Romanoffs brought a couple of carloads of little dreamers to Coffman’s office. Is this guy truly not smart enough to realize there are surveillance cameras all over Denver? On the video you watch Romanoff welcome the carload of little dreamers and then when they’re confronted by the building manager, Romanoff jumps in his Prius. OMG, a Prius. What a getaway car, and drives off the lot leaving the little dreamers to clean things up.
Now myself and my audience have been trying to shop that story to The Denver Post, Denver TV outlets and in particular KUSA, Channel 9. And thus my third bank shot — Kyle Clark and the entire crack KUSA news team. These people care about you so much that Kyle has a standard spam response to anyone who would offer the video or ask him why KUSA ignored it. The response from Kyle is laughable, including there was no evidence Romanoff directed students to the chalking. Which would mean he just happened to show up in a parking lot in the Prius at 3300 S. Parker Road by happenstance. Now come on. But we jumped into the time machine to watch Kyle Clark chase Mike Coffman down the street accusing him of then, God forbid, a birther thought which became the lead story on KUSA. Hmmmm.
You have Andy Pandy doing the dirty work and then escaping in his Prius but the confrontation that Kyle had with Iron Mike is worth revisiting the motion picture Rainman. Where all Coffman could say was, “I stand by my statement I apologize.”
In conclusion, several things. One, all the above-mentioned politicians are holding public office or want to. Two, the other names above mentioned manage your sources of information. I have this strange vision that on the evening news with Brian Williams he should open with, “Good evening, I’m Brian Williams. This is what we’d like you to think tonight. The door’s open boys anytime you want to walk in, come in. The weather’s fine in the studio.”
— Peter
by Mark Smiley | Aug 22, 2014 | Glendale City News
Company to perform natural gas line upgrade Aug. 26-28
Xcel Energy crews will be installing a major natural gas service line for a customer Aug. 26-28 in the Cherry Creek area; the project will impact traffic in the area as the company completes its work.
Xcel Energy will begin work for an underground boring operations beginning Aug. 26. On that day, the company will close one lane of eastbound traffic in the 2900 block of East First Avenue from 8:30 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. MDT. On Aug. 27-28, the company will close two lanes of westbound traffic along the same street, also from 8:30 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. MDT.
Motorists should expect significant congestion and delays during these lane closures. Alternative routes are suggested. Xcel Energy already has begun notifying local and commuter traffic in the area, through traffic message boards, of its work next week. On the day of the lane closures, barricades and traffic signs will be used to redirect traffic.
by Mark Smiley | Aug 5, 2014 | Featured Stories & Advertisers
