New Year’s Resolutions

by Peter Boyles | Dec 17, 2017 | Blasting with Boyles

• Governor John Hickenlooper — 2017 will be the end of the trail for the Governor. Getting off the sauce was a great career move and staying off of it for that 2020 run to dump GOP Senator Cory Gardner.
• Denver Mayor Michael Hancock — don’t go for the third term. Cash in while you can and get all the money developers promised you for destroying the City and County of Denver.
• Commander-in-Chief Donald Trump — another year like 2017 and they’ll put you on Mount Rushmore.
• DPD Chief Robert White — in spite of that resounding vote of confidence from your rank and file do your level best to stay on the job.
• Senator Cory Gardner — lucky the Chamber of Commerce promised you all those lobbying contracts because you are dead meat when Hickenlooper goes for the throat.
• Congressman Jared Polis — two words — opposition research, put on your hat.
• Tom Tancredo — once more into the breach. Wind in your sails and the Governor’s mansion in ’18.
• The Denver Post — down to a skeleton crew but hope for an In and Out Burger in your new Adams County digs.
• Denver’s Television Stations — another year like this one and you’ll be joining The Denver Post and be beaten by reruns of Gilligan’s Island.
• Denver’s Sports Reporters and Broncos Fans — I hope you cease and desist the term “we.” The team belongs to Annabel Bowlen and the “blood of the city.”
• To the loving couple Cynthia and Mike Coffman — welcome to the wide wide world of singledom. Recommend It’s Just Lunch and Millionaires.com.
• The Brownstein Law Firm — best of luck with the new Saudi king (winky winky).
• Brandon Marshall — hope your appearance on the show To Tell the Truth goes well.
• Denver District Attorney Beth McCann — if things go bad don’t go in the shower.
• Walker Stapleton — keep on reminding people you can choose your friends but not your relatives, ie. the Bushes.
• Mike “The King” Dunafon — best of luck for the inaugural season for the Glendale Raptors and Major League Rugby.
• Debbie Matthews — keep up the great billboards at Shotgun’s.
• George Brauchler — hope this run goes well but if this doesn’t work out please don’t join the Brownstein Law Firm.
• Stephan Tubbs and Terry Frei — two very good guys. All the very best in the future; you didn’t deserve what happened to you.

Happy New Year!

Christmas Gifts For My Friends From Peter Claus 2017

by Peter Boyles | Nov 20, 2017 | Blasting with Boyles

Sex, Lies And Videotape

by Peter Boyles | Oct 23, 2017 | Blasting with Boyles

December 2016 I wrote here in the Chronicle a column titled “Brandon Marshall Stands Up, Brownstein-Farber Takes A Knee.” I talked about the overwhelming amount of lies Denver Broncos linebacker Brandon Marshall told about what happened to him in Miami a year ago last summer. How, if memory serves me well, five cops jumped him, a Taser placed on his chest, the handcuffs put on him, placed in the back of a police car, driven somewhere, brought back where he was finally told, “If you don’t say anything we won’t say anything.” And that dear reader was the reason why Brandon Marshall says he took a knee.

The Denver Post is celebrating 125 years of being in the newspaper business. I think it’s more like 115 because they’ve been mailing this baby in for the last 10.

A couple of weekends ago The Denver Post, as hard as it to imagine, literally outdid itself in attempting to scam the Mile High City. Nicki Jhabvala known on our 710 KNUS radio as Nicki “Jambalaya” did a piece along with other hard-hitting Denver media representatives, with above said Brandon Marshall as he explained why he continues to do the clenched fist and other versions of taking a knee. Only this time the Miami fight with the law never comes up. Fascinated? Not one of those hard-hitting media members dared ask Brandon, “Hey man, the last time you talked to us you told us the cops did stuff to you in Florida. Why has that reason disappeared?” Are they just afraid? Misinformed? Hells bells, Nicki did the original story a year ago about the adventures of Brandon Marshall in Florida. I guess like some New York mobster on trial these gatekeepers of the truth have conveniently forgotten.

But The Denver Post gets worse. In their lead editorial October 13 of this year written by the entire Denver Post Editorial Board they go after Denver Police Corporal Zachery Phillips. Now here is the first sentence of that editorial and I quote… “Something is wrong when investigators can determine it is more likely than not that a Denver police officer paid a known prostitute for sex and lied about it and the officer keeps his job…”

Now substitute “Denver Mayor Michael Hancock.” If you all recall when Councilman/Mayor-Elect Hancock was visiting the working girls at Denver Players and Sugar, we had the call sheets. Some of the soiled doves ID’d his photo and The Denver Post and the Brownstein law firm offered him total protection.

Now they’re upset that Corporal Phillip paid for sex. Damn.

My next example of a great 115 years is George Lopez, booed off the stage after Trump jokes flop at a recent Denver gala. Now you would think that’s a huge deal, telling wealthy donors that they have white privilege and his opinion of old white men. Classy. But other than reading it in the New York papers it appeared six paragraphs in in the Post society column by Joanne Davidson.

Now flip it. George Lopez attacks Trump and gets a standing ovation. Sports fans that’s front page.

So why do you think nobody in the Denver media covered George Lopez? And as he has done many times Ed Greene Channel 4 Weatherman and KOA Radio anchor comes in for the save. I wonder if George cashed the check?

So there we have it folks. What do these three things have in common? Brandon Marshall, George Lopez and The Denver Post Editorial Board? Sex, lies and videotape. Or is there any way Norm and Steve can sleaze a dollar out of this deal?

A Tale Of Two Cities And The Blood Of Those Cities

by Peter Boyles | Sep 25, 2017 | Blasting with Boyles

It was the best of times, it was the worst of times, it was the age of foolishness, it was the age of wisdom . . . . Where have you intellectuals read that before?

Before I talk about why the North Koreans are leery of the United States I’d like to tip my hat to Harvey Steinberg and Annabel Bowlen, what a great job you two. Harvey found a loophole, a screw up by Arapahoe County on John boy’s crime spree. Harvey drove the Mercedes through it. You sure showed them but remember this dear reader, we are all gonna see John Bowlen again. There are only three places guys like me and John Bowlen end up, an institution — prison or hospital, a morgue slab or sober. Annabel make a choice for your son.

Next and far more importantly North Korea, Donald Trump and George Bush. Sweeping.

Believe me when I tell you that you are being sold a war by Donald Trump, mainstream media intellectuals, lightweight radio talk show hosts, ridiculous elected officials and the collective pinheads who pass off as opinion makers in our country.

Let me take you back in time. George Bush’s doctrine expression was the “axis of evil.” It was used by George Bush in his 2002 State of Union speech and whole- heartedly adopted by the “Dark Lord” Vice

President Dick Cheney. And who, you may ask, were those three nations who comprised the “axis of evil?” That’s right. Iran, Iraq and North Korea. George insisted the existence of these regimes was life threatening to the U.S. Rulers in Pyongyang, Tehran, and Baghdad were put on notice. Bush and Cheney lie and invade Iraq, leaving total destruction, over a million people dead and, as we speak, absolutely no outcome.

Now if you’re North Korea or the mullahs, they now know that Bush is willing to invade based on lies. Ask yourself this: In your neighborhood there’s a guy four doors down who says he’s going to destroy you, your neighbor up the street and the guy at the end of the block. Sure as hell your neighbor gets it. What do you do

next? You gun up. You put everybody on alert. You can trace back the mullahs and the No-Kos beginnings for questing a nuclear deterrent because of George Bush telling them they’re on the list.

I’ve been reading a lot about what life is like in North Korea.

Imagine American child labor before the turn of the 20th century; a child is considered literate when he can spell Kim’s name. There are no windows in houses. People have eaten bark on trees. Underwear and medicines are impossible to find. Elevators don’t work. Toilets don’t flush without buckets. Stores use candles for lighting.

Who are you going to kill and why? These people struggle to feed themselves once or twice a day. Monsters are created, rarely born. And you want to know something really rotten? How many people have the North Koreans killed testing weapons and shooting rockets? I hate to say this but to the best of my knowledge the answer is zero. How many people have died since George Bush launched his invasions? It is over a million. What will be the cost of this newest escapade? How many more young American lives will be destroyed? Please, before we begin another war, stop and think. The only way to win this is not to play.

Put the gun down and back away from Kim. He then will have no enemies that he can use to escalate and further manipulate his own people. For once just put the sword back in the scabbard, walk off the field and go home to your families.

P.S.: Take John Bowlen with you.

An Open Letter To Annabel Bowlen

by Peter Boyles | Aug 30, 2017 | Blasting with Boyles

Dear Annabel,

If I may be presumptuous —

Like most of the Front Range we’re currently watching your son John pull a series of minor and major league criminal activities predicated on his abundant use of alcohol and controlled substances.

When I read The Denver Broncos websites, you people are great champions of raising funds to fight women’s breast cancer, feeding hungry children and with the help of guys like Brandon Marshall, defeat police violence.

But it is my duty as a recovering addict and alcoholic (32 years on last Easter Sunday), so I’m going to do something that most people in recovery say is a big “no no”; I’m going to take your son’s inventory. According to a lot of the unwritten rules in sobriety taking another man’s inventory means to judge him, so here goes.

Absolutely every single thing that I have learned about treating alcoholics and addicts, you and your family have done the complete opposite.

How much money that could have gone to fight breast cancer, police violence and hunger have you paid our friend Harvey Steinberg? I believe Harvey’s ordered a second Mercedes.

Do you have the slightest notion of what “enable” means?

You have enabled the “blood of the city” to time and time again do the wrong thing.

When he told the Glendale cops he’s the owner of the Denver Broncos,  and (I don’t know what this will get you) a friend of the mayor — you have the wrong town’s mayor. If he meant Hancock, did they go to Players and Sugars? But I repeat myself. You’re putting on a seminar of how not to act as caring parents.

The late Bob Coté, founder of Step 13 had a motto. It went like this, “You want to help them? Don’t help them.”

You have bailed John Boy out of legal troubles for apparently more than a decade. According to court records he was charged with drug paraphernalia in Arapahoe County — charges dismissed, thank you Harvey.

Next, driving drunk in Boulder, the wrong way on a one-way street. Again, reduced to impaired. Do we tip the hat to Harvey again?

Finally, the 9-1-1 call from the girlfriend where apparently John had shoved her against the wall. What a funster. Also telling 9-1-1 nothing is wrong.

And now pulling an O.J. in a high-speed chase in San Luis Obispo County. And again, telling the highway patrolman he was trying to talk his dad out of selling the team. Kind of makes you proud doesn’t it.

Well apparently John has given himself up in Glendale. And again been bailed out.

As I write this I don’t know the outcome of it all, but I can almost guarantee to you and all the readers it will get worse.

Please take your son to Step 13 sober. Knock on the door, when they answer push him inside. Say I’ll see you in a year. If not it’s just a question of time. He’ll turn up again. On a serious note, remember this —  alcohol and drug addictions are degenerative. They’re worse tomorrow than they are today.

I leave tomorrow for Sturgis on the Haj, but I’d be willing to bet lunch, since you got your darling son out of Glendale he’s at least had a couple of drunks. Good luck. I’m easy to find. When you’re sick of paying Harvey, give me a call.

— Peter Boyles

Approaching 9/11

by Peter Boyles | Jul 24, 2017 | Blasting with Boyles

NEXT MONTH will mark 16 years since the Pearl Harbor event of our lifetime — the attack on the World Trade Center, the Pentagon and the aborted flight that crashed in central Pennsylvania,

What has happened in the aftermath? Since that terrible day, the United States, under three presidents, has found itself locked in war in the Middle East with the saber rattlers now looking at Iran and North Korea.

After the Japanese and Germans surrendered in 1945 and the beginnings of the Cold War, we have been a nation at war. Ask yourself these questions. What have we gotten for it? What’s been spent? What’s been lost?

I used to believe it was the politics of war in the Middle East. We know from reading history British soldiers arrived in southern Iraq to protect the oil from Persia. At that time the United States had no interest in the Middle East or for that matter any imperial designs in that part of the world. We were still dealing with Latin America and banana republics.

We have talked about it many times on my award-winning radio show and here in the column about what the British and French did to the Middle East after the First World War. American soldiers died in Iran during the Second World War. It’s hard to tell young people today but we were helping the Soviet Union and protecting Iranian oil. After that it seems to me we just stayed. Truman accepted the British Mandate for Palestine and it is game on.

Since that terrible day in September, the U.S. has been in involved in five wars in the Middle East. Let’s see if there’s a scorecard.

Afghanistan. I remember people telling me the U.S. was gong to bomb the Afghans into the Stone Age. How is that possible? They’re already there.

The United States has spent a trillion American dollars and thousands of young American lives and what have we got?

It gets worse.

Iraq. Hard to believe but a bigger disaster. George Bush is the worst American president, certainly in my lifetime and, could be argued would catch the blue ribbon with Woodrow Wilson. Is there any question Iraq is worse off than it was in 2003? The death toll will never be known. The cost incalculable and growing.

Libya. We got rid of Muammar Gaddafi in order to create a companion country for Somalia. And, of course how about Yemen? Those Houthi rebels are backed by Iran and Al-Qaeda. How can you not benefit from that?

I know all of you libs want to blame George Bush. You got my vote. He started two wars with no plan, in fact with lies.

Obama, if you’re a conservative, started or continued smaller scale wars. The result is the same.

Tell me, from watching military action and expenditures, have things gotten better or worse in the Middle East in the past 16 years?

Does anyone believe that even more war will create a lasting peace?

In this time period between FDR putting American soldiers in Iran and up to today, with Donald Trump selling billions of dollars of weapons to the Saudi Arabians (see past columns on my love for the Saudis), the Taiwanese, Obama’s Iranian arms deal, is there any case for us to be involved?

The United States should leave the Middle East as we speak.

If you read the history of Ireland you know that terrorism is a consequence of imperial rule and wars. Locals are unable to defeat the imperials so they impart high cost thru terror. Whether it’s Jewish settlers against British, Serbs against the Austro Hungarians, Vietnamese against the French or the crazies on 9/11 — As Peter, Paul and Mary once sang, “When will they ever learn?” When will we ever learn?

Out now.

— Peter Boyles